Wednesday, January 13, 2010

a day in the life of an unseasoned navy wife

I have been a Navy wife for 8+ years. We've been together for nearly 10. Before that I was a Marine Corps brat. You'd think with growing up in it, I'd be more accustomed, more adaptable to the chaos and uncertainty that loving someone in the armed forces often brings. 

I'm not though. I cry when he leaves, even if it's just for a week. I miss him like crazy the entire time he is away. I spray one of his old sweatshirts with his cologne and snuggle with it every night when I try to sleep. I worry, too. Not until I lost my mom did I realize how crippling worry can be. So I am working on that. On finding peace and feeling comfort. 

Anyway, only today did I feel like I'd finally joined the club of seasoned military wives. (Don't get excited for me-- I doubt this will stick.) 

You know those seasoned military wives? Who, instead of pouting and walking around with their arms folded tightly across their chest when told of another impending exit, the seasoned wife helps her husband pack,  makes him his favorite meal before he leaves, and with a heart leaden with pride, she kisses him goodbye and tells him quite confidently that she'll be just fine, he needn't worry. 

Yeah, I'm not one of them. I'd like to be. But in those moments, when he leaves, I tend to mope around and follow his steps like a pathetic little puppy, wanting so badly for him to stay home with us, to be like a 'normal' family, wife, children AND HUSBAND all present and accounted for. I miss him before he even leaves my side.

Today is a new day though. (Or maybe the pregnancy hormones have finally done me in....THAT is a good possibility, too.)

Here is our text exchange that took place this morning. I'll preface it with saying I am sick and tend to get even more random, more lost in thought when I'm under the weather. But really, that's just me. I have a feeling you've figured that out by now :)

Me: Hi honey. When you get out of the navy, I was thinking we could start a horse ranch. In montana. Or kansas. Or a dakota. Or someplace like that. I like horses. And I like ranches. And I like you. What do you think?

Me: We'll have enough kids to put em to work as ranch hands. Maybe on your way home you could stop at the library and get a book on horse ranches so we can learn how to do it.

Me: Also, on your way home, could you stop and get me 4 russett potatoes, heavy cream, and cheddar. Maybe steak if you want that too.

(still) Me: I found a new recipe for potatoes au gratin and they looked delicious. What else goes with potatoes au gratin?

(again) Me: How come you aren't responding? Its rude to leave people hanging, you know. Especially your wife. Your sick wife. Speaking of, I am coughing. Want me? 

Him: Sorry a little busy right now will get you in a minute. I will just say a good possibility of haiti

Me: Oh. OK. Does that mean you can't get me potatoes?

Me: And cream and cheddar. Need those, too.

My husband is a man of few words. Clearly. But that's okay, because I am a woman of many. Clearly. 

*Oh, and as of now, his squadron is not going to Haiti. But I'll pray for his fellow search and rescue crewmen who are going to help, and I'll pray that the people of Haiti feel His comfort and love, today and always. 

1 comment:

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