a new discovery!

So, as most of you know, I bow. It is now appropriate and acceptable (at least, to me) to use the word 'bow' as a noun, verb, adjective, adverb....the list goes on. When my children are tightly tucked into their beds and dreams of Mickey Mouse's house are playing out in their sweet heads, I am making bows.

The only reason I am not making bows RIGHT THIS VERY SECOND is because I took a break to share with you....I've discovered a new bow that I really, really like. Really.

I love this new bow because I get to experiment with mixing a bunch of colors, patterns, and textures together. The loopy bow has stolen my heart. Unfortunately, my daughter does not share my passion. She prefers the dainty clips or pinwheel bows in her hair. So, I guess for now I am just creating them to add to my etsy shop. You can check them out HERE!

Okay, now that I have shared that, I am going to go cuddle up next to my husband. The only downfall to my current obsession.... a little less snuggle time with my wonderful man. No more of that! At least, not tonight ;)

I've gone and done it!

Finding my home being overrun by the bows I have made my unwilling little princess, I finally got an etsy site. My husband could not be happier.....he's hoping we make back just some of the money we've poured into this obsessive bow making hobby. Okay, really, he is just thrilled that at least some of these bows will be leaving our home-- did I mention I've made a gajillion. Yes, a gajillion!! I've counted.

You can see the site  by clicking  HERE.  Please take a look and let me know what you think. Starting the etsy site was a little humbling, and quite daunting, so if you have any suggestions, I'm all ears....well, not all. I only have 2. But they are prepped and ready to hear ya!

here are a few of the things I've got....

smooches and hugs!!

she lights us up

I woke up this morning to gray, gloomy skies, and a sense of uneasy nervousness. It almost felt like God matched the weather to my mood. (Comical, I admit. Please don't think I am so grandiose in my thinking that I would actually believe God selects rain or shine based on the emotional state of little ol' Shannon. I said it almost felt like....)

Today, my dad goes before the lawyers involved in the lawsuit regarding my mom's death. He will have to define the loss of my mother in tangible terms.....something I find both deplorable and unfeasible. He will be forced to sit and watch as my beautiful mother's abundant life is reduced to spreadsheets, power point displays, and legal conjecture.

To any person, that would be grim. To the man who loved her more than his human heart would allow, such a thing is torture unimaginable.

Only by the skin of his teeth, and through the grace of God has my dad made it this far- emotionally speaking. I think each day is a treacherous walk through grief and loneliness, and he is forced to push such raw emotion and heartache aside, just to manage the day to day things that most of us consider every day life.

When I spoke to him yesterday, I asked my Dad if he was ready. A ridiculous question, but something I felt compelled to ask. I think asking him that was my way of asking him if he was mentally prepared for what would happen. Again, I know that is ridiculous, but I guess the mom in me wanted to let him know that I understood how difficult going into court would be and that even though we are separated by thousands of miles, I would be with him.

I find myself looking up at the picture of my mom as I type this, and every time I do I feel reassured. She just always seemed to know that everything would work out just as it should. Her faith was strong. She never questioned the path she was walking or expressed fear or upset at the pitfalls and detours that sprung up along her route. She just kept walking, and found joy and love around every bend. What's more, she shared that joy and love with all of us. I never went a day not knowing how loved, how special, and cared for I was.

So, I am hoping that my dad walks though today's events as my mom would have done, with love and compassion in his heart. I hope, and I pray, that he feels my mom's love lighting him up today. I pray that he tunes out the legal jargon and brushes off the way they treat my mother like a file folder, and instead focuses on her lovely face.

Something good will come from what takes place today in that courtroom. Many goods already have sprung up, once He called my mom home.

My sister and I have never been closer-- my mom's lifelong wish. We have leaned on each other.

I have embraced my God with a renewed passion. I have found so much peace in knowing that this path was carved out long before I came to be, and knowing that He is here with me, enveloping me with His love.

I have learned that isn't what we do, or what we have or give, or things we say that matter to people. It is how we make them feel. My mom made us feel like we were all amazing, talented, remarkable, and significant. Like God gave her a family of extraordinary people that she was blessed to be amongst. When you make someone feel like they are something special, they become something special...even if the special is in the smallest of ways- special is special. Without a doubt, that was the greatest gift she gave me.

So today, I am gonna walk through the muck and know how special I am to have a mother who continues to light me up. I love her so much!!

And wouldn't you know it.....the gray is fading away, and rays are shining through the clouds. Grandiose or not, I'm basking in it. Love you Mom! (I am aware that my mom doesn't read my blog- that was for my own benefit. I just feel good saying it!)

First things first

There's a first time for everything! Now, I don't know about you, but I think firsts are so exciting, worthy of celebration. Well, maybe not every first. I certainly did not celebrate my first bad grade. Nor do I cherish the memory of my first car accident. But I remember the first time I kissed my husband so vividly in my head. Oh, and the first time my husband, not even a 'boyfriend' at the time, told me he loved me. What a moment! And not many memories top the first time I felt my first child kick in my belly--absolute bliss? Yep, firsts are pretty amazing. We had some exciting, memory-making firsts this week!

Tyler had his first school dance. No need to go back- you read that correctly. My kindergartner went to his first school dance. And by dance, I mean a bunch of kids aged 5-8 crowded in a gymnasium, in varying stages of sugar-crazed madness from the candy being peddled at a dozen different tables, while Taylor Swift and Hannah Montana screeched loudly from the speakers. It was LOVELY. 

Another first for Tyler- his first NOTE!! I was looking through his backpack on Tuesday and found a folded piece of paper tucked away. I kid you not, this is what it said: 'Tyler, you are cool. I am glad you are one of my best friends. Keep on being cool. Rock on. From Braydon.' Ummmmm......excuse me? Notes? In KINDERGARTEN??? As stunned as I was, I do realize how cute it is that this little boy took time to write my son a note, and was impressed with the words he wrote out (it was clearly written by a 5 year old). Truthfully, I also think it's pretty sweet that someone -other than myself- thinks Tyler is a pretty cool dude. 

On the Kaiti front, a HUGE first! Both Miss Pat and Miss Ashley reported that my sweet girl was singing loud and proud in chapel on Wednesday! She loves to sing, all the time, but up until this week, she never sang in chapel. She might have moved her lips or whispered words here and there, but never sang, and sang loudly at that! She has now mentioned that she might want to sing in the Cherub Choir......be still my beating heart! My daughter continues to amaze me, and we celebrate each brave step away from shyness, and towards an ever-so-subtle daring boldness. 

Jack's first isn't really one we are celebrating. My littlest son has decided that he is becoming nocturnal. Now, we've tried reasoning with him. We've tried changing his routine up. We've tried letting him cry it out, we've tried rocking him. Still, he remains firm. I hope to report back soon (VERY soon) with some victorious news on our part. 

Our final first is something we are going to attempt tomorrow-- camping!! The Kopschs are celebrating Christopher's 7th birthday with an overnight camp-out at Hanna Park, so we are packing up some gear and heading east-- okay, so it's only 25 miles east, but still!! I know it is has been done many, many times, and I would not think it was even worth mentioning, were it not for the first I mentioned above. I am hoping that the fresh air might actually cure Jack of his nighttime wakefulness. In case that doesn't work, then I hope that the campers near us sleep deeply..... Come what may, we're all excited about our little adventure. And with the 3 kids in a tent, it is SURE to be a first we won't soon forget.

Happy Trails!!